Why do we crave love?
What a million dollar question! It’s also one that Dr Helen Fisher and her team set about answering.
In the video below Dr Fisher describes the study which involved MRI scans of those recently dumped, and those happy in love for longer than 20 years in a quest to discover why we crave love.
What did the research find?
“Almost nobody gets out of love alive” ~ Dr Helen Fisher
– Love is deeply embedded in us.
– The part of our brain that really comes alive with love, was still going strong in couples in love.
– When we are dumped and heartbroken there is still intense brain action in the cells connected to romantic love and our reward system becomes more active because we can’t get what we want – love. There was also activity in the part of the brain associated with calculating and loses and the area connected to deep emotional attachment’s. It’s no wonder breakups hurt so bad!
– Romantic love is one of the most powerful sensations on earth.
– Romantic love is an addiction, for example we focus on the person, crave them, distort reality, obsessively think of them are willing to risk life and limb to be with them.
– Romantic love has 3 main characteristics of addiction – tolerance, withdrawals and relapse.
– We are not the only ones who love, animals do to.
Why do we fall in love with one person and not another?
Dr Helen Fisher ends on the one big question she is currently researching – why do we fall in love with one person but not another?
As she goes on to say, we already know that similar intelligence and education levels, upbringing & socioeconomic background, the same general good looks and the same religious values play a part. But that’s it. That’s as far we know. So any matchmakers who tell you they use a ‘social technique to matchmake’ are fibbing….unless they happen to know something top scientists don’t 😉
I’ve really just scratched the surface though, this 16 minute video is fascinating so please do take the time to watch, it pulls a whole different perspective on why we crave love, and finding it.
Thanks for watching and please share any thoughts you have in the comment section below.
Caroline x